"im not ready yet..."

Sex, its a very picky subject to some, i personally beleive that if you trust someone with your life and your with them there is no real opposition to having sex with them, i mean come on its just sex, and if you trust the pperson, you WILL trust them that they will wear a condom, its not that difficult, i lost my virginity when i turned 15 1/2. and i will admit, i was raped, my first boyfriend did it to me and he also abused me, but that was a long time ago.im a new person now, but on another note, sex, it has changed my life dramatically. sex isnt just something you to to feel good, it isnt a thing you do to be cool like the media has made it seem like, i blame the media for more than half of the teen pregnancies in the united states today. they just make it seem like its so amazing and you should do it alot and no shows about the consiquences of sex or what can happen if you get a disease or anything like that. i have actually decided to go without sex for about 4 months, hopefully it works out nicely. :) What are your views on this?

like to blog about there problems. and most people like to blog about how there days and there lives have gone, today i am blogging about a boy, a boy who has changed my world, a boy who has flipped my world upsidown and sideways a few times. i really never beleived in true love before last night, but i really do beleive now, that everyone has someone that they will spend their lives looking for that they can stay with untill the day they die, now i beleive that there was a whole half missing to my world, the reason everything was moving so god damn slow, its all because you havent found them yet, theres a certian person who can completley make you fall head over heels for and they wont stop untill they are finally yours, i wont stop untill i live close enough to where i can be with him, untill i can actually fell him hold me every single day and just know that i can see him and hold him too. ive found my other half, and i really am truly happy now, it feels like all of my worries have washed away and i can actually see clearly again, whenever im around him it just feels like a dream, i guess they were right, when reality is better than your dreams, you are only then truly happy, i cant beleive i found him, my heart beats a million times a second whenever i see his face or even hear his voice, i dont want anyone else anymore, hes just that perfect that i can say im done with looking and that ive found him, the one person that i can love and look up to as my own,

now that im done ranting, heres what actually happened, you know how i told you i was gonna go see rick? well i did, and oh my was it amazing, first off driving to see him was a great adventure, it was like a mini road trip, we stopped at buest buy to get cady and then on our way i had to sit in the back of an altima with a bike that was squishing my feet. then once we got there i saw ricks mom in the garage and said "hey is rick here" then she said "who are you" "um... rhianna" "ohhhh so your rhianna!" lol it made me smile, so me and nick and angel went inside and i gave him a big hug, he was pumping up an air raft, but then nick stupidly broke a chair, so me nick rick and angel ran around surprise for about 2 hours looking for one, then we stopped at a mc donalds cause angel was hungry, and me and rick saw some black girl who had a super long bandanna flowing out of her pocket, so we decided that black people have tails now, aha, we got back in nicks car and i was laying on rick in the back seat and we kissed, it was... amazing really, i dont think ive ever felt like that to anyone elses kisses xD. it was like wow, i cant even explain how good it was, but we got back to ricks house and we went swimming, all the while ricks stalker came over and we had to stop being all touchy touchy, witch made me sad, but she left an hour later and he was all over me again, his mom came out and made us food, so we left at around 12 ish but before we left me and rick made love. we made love under a full moon, i knew it would be something romantic like that so we left and went home, all i dreamt about was him holding me. it was a good night :)